Hello and welcome to Cooking Issues. This is Dave Arnold, your host of Cooking Issues coming to you live from the Heart of Manhattan Rockefeller Center at New Stan Studios, joined via Skype for however long her Skype minutes last. Nastasia the hammer Lopez live from Paris. How you doing? I'm good.
How are you? All right. How is it over there? I I it's fine. I extended the trip thinking that it would be great, but I think I should have just no offense to no offense to France, but uh I think I should have just come back after Egypt.
Okay. That's how I'm feeling. Like uh Egypt was amazing. I mean Egypt was amazing. So I wish I had it stopped, you know what I mean?
Okay, when was the last year's great? When was the last time you were in Paris? Oh god, I don't know. Like eight years or nine years ago. When did they start doing the flashing Eiffel Tower?
'Cause I I kinda like the flashing Eiffel Tower. Disco Tower? John probably pre-2000. It was leading up to the millennium. Oh really?
Yeah. Yeah, now it's like every hour at night that they do it. Yeah. Yeah. It's pretty sick.
Yeah. What neighborhood are you staying in? Saint Germain. Oh. Well, maybe that's why you don't like it.
You're basically staying you're basically staying in like No, no, it's literally no no no no no no no no no no. It's literally uh you we can talk about it when I come back. But like the the food and the way the people in Egypt like the love that they had for it and everything. Well, I mean the Parisians obviously are not happy you're there. Right?
I mean the Parisians obviously don't care that you're there. Right. Right. I mean they're not happy. They're not happy, no.
Right. Right. I mean, you know, the Egyptians are very happy. Very happy. Let me put it to you this way.
If you got stepped on by a Parisian, they wouldn't like remove you from their shoe with their hand. They would just wipe you off on the corner. You know what I mean? That's what I'm trying to say. But you know, you know what I remember about Paris is there's definitely for me a before and an after Paris.
Like in and the before and after is when Paris got good at picking up dog poo. Because Parisians are the world's worst dog poo picker uppers. They refuse to pick up after their dog. It's like it's like goes back to some like it's the one little piece of like French aristocracy they want to hold on to. No, I will not pick up my dog's poo, right?
And so sometime around, I don't know, probably also somewhere near the millennium, like Paris was like, We're just gonna spend a lot of money on these vacuums, we're gonna suck up all this poop. And they have motorcycles with the vacuums on them, and somebody just goes around vacuuming up dog all day. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But before that, dog poo, yeah. The two poopiest places on earth, Florence, which is a city of poo.
I have never seen as many varieties of poo in a one-hour time as I saw years ago in Florence. It was just like it it was almost like, you know, you go to what is their museum, the Ufizi, you go to the Uffizi to see all the art, and then you just walk around the streets to see how many different varieties of poo you could find, like like a like a I love Florence too. And the Duomo. And the Duomo. And the Duomo.
Yeah, you know what? Dax doesn't go anywhere with us because he says, Mom, Dad, all you want to do is museums and churches, museums and churches. And we were like, what about when we took it to Kyoto? And he was like, Those are temples, different. Those are cool.
I'm like, all right, man. All right. Wow. All right. Oh my god, name.
Oh my god. I have to say one thing. So the Italians on the on the Egyptian boat, they um we got off the boat, and they give you your tap at the end where they're like, you had this many bottles of wine, right? Because that's separate from everything else. And so the Italians had sixteen, but it's a couple.
They had sixteen bottles of wine in a five day fan, right? Damn. And so they paid it. So then we're like they were like, Oh, let's go to dinner off shore. Let's in uh Aswan, let's have dinner.
So we sit down and the husband says, I'm gonna get a cocktail because I haven't had a drink all week. That's so Italian. That's the most Italian thing I've ever heard. I know, I know. That's so Italian.
Yeah. You go to lunch for the Italian, they take a whole bottle of wine down. You you you you eat dinner, they take a whole bottle of wine down. You want a cocktail? I'm not an alcoholic.
What am I? I don't drink. Like what? What? Yeah.
The weirdest culture, man. Oh man. Yeah. That's that's class that's classic Italian. I need to go back to Italy 'cause that's that's that's some classic business right there.
I know. Uh uh have you have you been to the uh you know I like to check out supermarkets. Have you gone to see what's up with the Monopre, the single price these days? Yeah. Yeah.
How was it? Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But any good yeah. Great.
All kinds of fruits and vegetables, yeah. And did you went to the there there used to be one right there by Saint Germain deprece? There's still one right there. You have to go downstairs, like you go in at the at the corner, go down. Yeah, yeah.
I've been there many times. Many times. Uh what's the worst country for supermarkets? I'm trying to think. Like just the worst country for supermarkets.
The worst supermarkets have ever been. Like Iceland. Oh my god, you know what? Iceland. Okay.
That's because I I get what you're saying. Because you're like, that's how much it costs? That's how much it costs. Oh my god, that's how much it costs, and they only have the three things. But they do have the good licorice there.
Yeah. They do have the good licorice. You know. Sure. Yeah.
Sure. Yeah. Yeah. Did you like did you uh they also like, I think for tourists, because 90% of the people in that country at any given time are tourists, except I guess not in the winter, but like, like they have like, they're like, here's your fermented chalk. I know you want it.
And I would have to say it's fine. Oh god. It's fine. Fine. No, no, it's not.
It's disgusting. It's fine. Look, if you can I've said this many times. If you can accustom yourself to eating uh ammoniated cheese, not that you not that you like ammoniated cheese, but I'm saying you've all had it. They someone brings it out, they're like, I love this cheese, and they give it to you, and it's like way over the hill, and it's like it smells like a cleaning agent.
And you're like, I'll eat it to be polite. So if you've done that before, then you can handle it. You know what I mean? That's all I'm saying. I'm not saying you enjoy it.
And did I bring this up on the air or to a friend of mine? Uh every uh by the way, congratulations to Harold uh and I'm not gonna say anything more. I'm not gonna bust them out on the air, but I gotta talk to you about it afterwards, Nastasia. Do you guys know? Oh boy.
Here's a fact. Do you guys know that if you're in I didn't know this? It's an interesting fact. If you're in for men too, not just women, if you're in a ceremonial kimono complete with the official underwear, there's no flap in that underwear. No flap in that underwear.
Good to know. I did not know that. This is a new fact for me. And what? Why does it matter?
Well, because sometimes people need to use it, Stas. You need to use the restroom. I mean, not not everyone has, you know, not everyone has the ability. Yeah. Like, do you use the actually use the flap?
And they're like, no, I never use the flap. There's no way to remove, you have to remove what I'm trying to get to is you have to completely disrobe to get these ceremonial chonies off. And you can't like get like anything out of it to do anything with. You know what I'm saying? That's all I'm saying.
Yeah. Anyways. Wait, were you in one? No. No, I just learned it from someone who was at a wedding the other day.
Uh wearing one uh for the first time. And uh, and just like I feel like you want to practice. I feel like if you're gonna for nine hours like have to keep your undies on and not remove them, that like you know, somebody better ought to tell you that like in advance you want to practice, work your way up to it. It's like learning to breathe at the bottom, or not breathe, learning to not breathe at the bottom of a pool, right? You gotta work your way up.
Yep. Like my fear of public restrooms can keep me from using the restroom in an airplane for a long time. You know what I mean? As I get older, I'm carrying a little bit less. I'll use a restroom in an airplane.
But I've been on the flight many times from Newark, New Jersey, to Hong Kong without using the restroom. Because I'm like, no, no. The power move is to use it right when you get on the plane. Get that economy plus, get on the airplane right away, zip back, use it once, sit down, like buckle yourself in, and you know, get ready for the ride. That's what I'm saying.
You know what I mean? Yeah. Stas will use it a lot, but hates it. Oh yeah. Oh yeah.
I don't know of a worse feeling than when you're in an airplane bathroom and the turbulence hits. And you're like, oh, first of all. No, oh man. First of all, you hear the boom and you're like, oh man. Yeah.
Like, if you're lucky, you're just doing the number one, but even with the number one, you're like, I'm gonna paint this bathroom. I'm about to paint this bathroom. Not because I want to. Trying to wedge yourself up against the scale. Yeah, that's the worst.
That's the worst. That's like, you know, like uh, you know, in the in the in the they try to make a romantic thing out of an airplane bathroom in the TVs and the movies and stuff. I'm like, what? No. Yeah.
Nothing on on earth could be less sexy than an airplane bathroom. Yeah. In my in my opinion. Yeah. People are like, m first of all, who flies at 5,280 feet?
Mile High Club is the dumbest name. Any club. That's like everyone in Denver. Everyone in Denver is a member of the Mile High Club. Stupid.
Anyway, uh dumb. And uh Jackie Molecules, you're back in uh you're back in the uh great state of California. I am in Los Angeles. I saw a TV program uh with the with the Los Angeles on it, and it had the same view that I love from a different TV show in Los Angeles. I was pining for it for that, for that hills view.
I love the sparkly look of uh Los Angeles from the hills. Like all the little colored lights, all the stuff moving around, like spreading out a little bit of haze up in that piece. Don't fix all your pollution, Jack. Just a little bit of it. Fix a little bit of pollution so it's not dangerous for your lungs.
Keep a little bit because it sparkles, it sparkles in the night. You know what I'm saying? It's romantic. Yo, I remember in the in the 70s and 80s when I would fly in there to visit my grandparents in San Bernardino, and back then it was like a constant it the pollution was so thick, it was like a dust storm. It was like it was like so thick, it like you could see the air.
It was like uh go watch Night of the Comet. Stas, you've seen Night of the Comet, right? No, I haven't. So the idea is that it's a zombie apocalypse in LA in the in the in the 80s, and that's got some prime 80s style LA pollution action in it. Well, don't well, don't they like like hold up in a in a movie theater?
Anyone who is underground uh survives and then they have to come out and fight. You know what I mean? Anyway. Uh and what's up with what's up with you, Joe? How you doing?
Got Joe Hazen rocking the panels up here in New York. I'm doing well. How about yours? You you're looking really fresh in that orange shirt. Oh, I gotta go orange.
You know what? I used to have this rule. I used to have this rule. I don't follow it anymore, but in college I came up with this. The more tired I am, the brighter a color I will wear.
This way no one will know. No one will know. Uh that's a great idea. I like that. Yeah.
Uh I also had another rule. Uh uh, a shower is worth two hours of sleep, but you can't pull a full eight with showers. You can go from four hours of sleep to eight hours of sleep by taking a couple showers during the day, but you can't make it, you can't completely give up sleep just by showering and drinking coffee. You never had the micro shower to wake yourself up? I mean, I do that in the morning.
No, no, but you've never been like, oh my god, I'm so tired. Either I go to sleep right now or I'm gonna take a shower, and then I can work more. He's never done that. I mean, I did that over the weekend when I did the pig roast. Well, speaking of why I haven't introduced you yet, we're about to talk about John.
Get this. He buys what I like to call an in-between her pig. So an in-betweener pig is anything that's larger than a suckling pig, but smaller than about 200 pounds, uh, or like 220 live weight or something like this. So, how big was your pig? Uh 90 pounds.
In between her pigs? In between them. Straight in between her pig. Now, how much flesh did it upon's body? Because a suckling pig is basically like a sack of bones with some you know, sucking with delicious meat on it, but it's a lot of bones.
So how how fleshed out was the meat on a 90 pound pig? Not as much as I was expecting. Pretty thin layer like around the torso and the hams were big, but I don't know, not huge. Like we didn't have any leftovers when we had about 70 people there. Yeah, yeah.
Well, what the pig wants to do with its life, if you didn't kill it, right, is build up its bone mass first and then and then you know, yeah, build out. Uh okay, so now let's talk about the the technique. Your mom rented a uh a pit, right? A rotisserie. Yeah, okay.
Now let's talk about this. Let's talk, as Jack Nicholson said in the shining. What is uh what happened with this rotisserie unit? Well, it was already a nightmare from the get go because it didn't have a lid on it, so everything was gonna take a lot longer. Or infinity of wood.
Yeah, a lot, a lot of charcoal. Uh, used coal? Yeah. I start off with wood at the beginning. How many how many pounds of coal did you go through?
Used eight bags that I think were each like 20 pounds. Oh, not that much. I thought you were gonna use like Essex steam train quantities of. No, not okay. Not that huge, but still like a lot, you know, the really big bags.
Um you ever cook with anthracite, like the way that some of the coal oven people do? No. Me neither. I wonder what that's like. Yeah, I don't know.
I've never even lit a piece of anthracycle. Yeah, I don't think I have either. I've been hit in the face with it on the Essex Steam train, but I've never used it myself. Uh you ever have uh your parents give you the lump of anthracite coal as a joke for the Christmas? No.
I did many times. Yeah, my parents loved me. Oh, yeah. Well, not me so much. Uh all right, so go ahead with the rotisserie.
Um But really the worst thing about this rotisserie, apart from not having a lid, was the terrible motor on it. So that when you know the pig would do the rotation, get to the top, as soon as it would kind of like go over that, it would lurch down. Oh my god, can I make the noise for you? I hate it's so triggering. Annoying.
And then it's just it causes so many problems towards the end of the cooking process. Yeah. Well, the problems start early. You just don't notice until later. Yeah.
Yeah. What do you like better? The fact that it tears the meat up because it like keeps like hitting itself too hard. Do you like that? Which actually makes the the whole slip and fall even worse every time it goes around.
Or do you like the underdone, overdone part where it one piece travels past the fire too fast and so it doesn't get the same brown and the other piece stays there too long? Which part do you like better? That defin those both definitely happened. I'd rather the latter because dealing with the meat falling apart and everything was such a nightmare to deal with. Listen, listen.
Uh I don't know because I haven't had an outdoor uh rotisserie in a long time, right? So and back the last time I had an outdoor space, I wasn't doing rotisserie. I was doing either tandoor or cowboy grilling. Hashtag vertical grilling, hashtag horizontal grilling. Uh, and I didn't do things that needed to cook for long enough to do a rotisserie.
I built everything around cooking very, very quickly, right? Uh like if I was gonna cook a pig on that cowboy, that sucker would be spread out like it was uh, you know, a flying pig. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Uh you ever you know I've never done, I've never done the diagonal like uh like South American style where you put it on the diagonal where you flatten it, put it on the diagonal and you move it around.
I want to try that sometime. Yeah, yeah. Right? It'd be fun, no? Yeah, no, it would be interesting.
Yeah. I wonder how too comfortable. You could make that at New Lab. Well just I can make it, but where am I gonna go with it? Go out on on like Clinton and Grand Street in the lower east side.
Can you imagine? Can you imagine in the lower east side? Like where I live, pe like I I'm outside and be like, that's an awful lot of wood. What are you doing with all that wood? You're like, it's my wood.
Why don't you shut up? Yeah. Get out of here. You know what I mean? Like people are so nosy where I live.
You know what I mean? It's like everyone is in in everyone else's business because it's all co-ops. Yeah. So they all think they have a reason to be in your business. People, so like I'll pick up after the dog, and they're like, You're not like some of them.
I'm like, Some of who? Some of who some of those dog people who don't pick up after the dog. Get away from me. You know what I mean? Just leave me after.
Just leave me alone. Don't talk to me. Anyway, so uh it is a commonly known fact that ninety-nine nine percent of all rotissary motors aren't just not good. They suck. Yeah.
They're ac they actively hurt the food, right? And it's because the gear motors have too much backlash. They're not using uh the right kind of gear. You know what I'm saying? Yeah.
So if you used a gear so so what you're experiencing there is the gear backlash. Now, there are motors that there are zero backlash or very low backlash motors. And the problem is they're like 20% more expensive. Yeah. But get that 20% more expensive.
You would pay 40% more to have a motor that didn't act that way, and yet they're only 20% more expensive. Yeah. I mean, the I had to take the pig off the spit in the morning, you know, hack the like waste off with my cleaver, you know, put that part in the oven then because they was just completely falling off and it was gonna not cook through. Um turned into a horror show. Yeah, yeah.
How is the meat though? Good. Yeah, yeah, good. Yeah. Could have cooked a little longer, but good enough.
Well, when I was in uh grad school when we built uh the uh that's the second to last time I built a rotisserie. Uh I stole a well, Mark McNamara, my studio mate, and I, you know, we did the whole thing. We cut 55 gallon barrels in half, burned them out to get rid of all the toxins. You know, Mark and I inhaled those toxins on the roof, burned them out, welded the stuff in, stole some, stole some expanded metal, used it as the grates, reinforced the whole nine. And then we stole um you can buy them surplus, they're really good.
A bowdine brand DC gear motor. They're like like they used to use them in the uh in the chemical and nuclear engineering lab that was downstairs in our building. Okay. And they were these like tough as nails little uh DC motors and zero backlash, and we just built the rotisserie with that, and we spun that pig all day, no problems. If that pig doesn't undergo any slap adappa-doo with gear backlash, it just it makes a world of difference.
I believe it. I believe it. Rotisserie super stressful. Rotisserie designers out there, somebody make a decent motor. I'm sure somebody makes a decent motor, but I don't think the average person when they're shopping for rotisserie knows like how bad this is gonna be.
But also, like as the rental company, like why wouldn't you just get the good stuff? Because it because you're gonna rent from them once, and you know what? If you did it, you would rent it again. Yeah. It's the same reason why restaurants in Times Square suck, because you're in Times Square, you're gonna eat at that restaurant.
Yeah, they don't care. There's no incentive for them to be better. Not only that, as you know, when we're building stuff at our factories, right, if not everyone is doing it, it's impossible to get someone to do it for you. Yeah. You're like, I want to use a good motor.
Why? No one else uses a good motor. Yeah, you don't need it. You're like, you're wrong. Like, I'm a cook.
You're not. You know what I mean? Like, make it right. But no one does. Yeah.
I'll also add that my hog I was less than impressed with uh what the farmer did. I mean, it was still pretty dirty. Had to shave a lot. There were just like still dirt between the toes and everything. That's old school though.
You didn't appreciate that? I didn't singe it. Did you torch singe the head? Did you scrape? Yeah, yeah.
Oh, sweet. Um, yeah, it's not a good thing. Not like completely, but yeah, it smelled terrible. But then also, like, he didn't bleed it as well as I think he could have. So, like, as it was cooking, you know, blood starts coming out of like all the holes, and just like as it's turning, it just like creates these like black ring marks around the head.
Num num. Yeah. Hey, Nastasia. Uh, she's gone. Already Skype Credits.
Oh my God. So dumb. So stupid. Like, oh my God. All right.
Unbelievable. All right. But she talked so much in the intro, she had to figure it all out. Well, you know that's a good thing. It's those French Skype credits.
Nastasia has this thing. She's like, she's like, the show is one hour long. I'm gonna buy one hour. She did that last week and fell off. And she did that this week and fell off.
It's not like last week it was quicker. Last week it was like nine minutes. This time it lasted 14. Yeah, but l but but but the thing is, like I'm sure, like A, the show would pay her to do that, to to buy the extra time, right? One, right?
And two, it's better to be on a lower quality audio and just use the regular internet connection than it is to have a like a semi-high quality audio for 13 seconds and then drop. That's all. Anyways. Uh anyways. Anyways.
So I have some information for people before we get to uh questions, because people people have been uh asking me some questions. Ready? Ready. Beans. Oh, beans.
Beans questions. Now I'm not willing to give all of my bean stuff out because I haven't tested all my bean stuff yet, but I'm gonna give you some information that might be useful in your life. You ready for this? So, first information I want you to get into into your head. How many, how many of you out there, you can't answer me because you're not.
Oh, by the way, if you're listening on Patreon, we should do this now, right? If you're listening on Patreon, uh you can call your questions in too 917-410-1507. That's 917-410-1507. If uh you don't know what we're talking about, Patreon and want to join, John, tell them what to do. Go check out patreon.com/slash cooking issues, and you can see all the great membership levels.
You got a bunch of cool perks, you get access to the Discord where we are just like constantly having great uh discussions about things on the show and things beyond the show. If you like the show, you'll love the Discord. Um book discounts at Kitchen Arts and Letters, and just like really a whole bunch of other great stuff. So check us out. Here's three different kinds of people who might hear this.
Ready? Europeans who don't know how or no, not Europeans. That's terrible to me. People anywhere not here. Anywhere not here.
Everywhere, not here, right? They uh I just think of it as metric as French. Sorry. I just you know what I mean? My my bad.
Because they they voiced it on us. Anyway, so metric people who won't know how to convert into what I'll now call American units, right? Americans who don't know how to call uh who convert into metric units, right? And then that small subset of people who have in their heads the instantly the conversion between like inches and centimeters, right? I'm gonna assume that you're that last group, John.
So don't shout it out. I want you guys to because it this is gonna be important. You gotta remember this, it's gonna help you in cooking, right? Right? Okay, so get in your head how many centimeters are there in an inch.
Now, I'm not gonna tell you, I want you to think about it first. One, two, three, ready? I'm gonna tell you, ready? 2.54, right? So anytime you're converting between it's 2.54, right?
Uh now, here's another reason to remember the number 2.54. When you are looking at uh sodium on a label, when I try to figure out what a recipe should be like, and I'm and I'm looking at commercially produced stuff, one of the things you want to know is the salt content of the food that you're looking at so you can get a target for where you are, right? But they don't actually write on the back of a can. This goes back to beans, because I was researching like how much salt was in baked beans and whatnot, right? When you're looking at the back of the can, they don't tell you what they tell you is milligrams of sodium, right?
You with me now? Okay. So milligrams is easy, right? Just, you know, if it's a thousand milligrams, that's one gram. I'm not gonna talk about that.
But to figure out how much salt that is, which is what you use in the kitchen, multiply by 2.54. It's the same. I mean, there's a couple of decimal points afterwards, but it's close enough. So if you if you if you read the number of milligrams of s of sodium and you calculate how much like salt you know there is per hundred grams or per whatever, 2.54. Very easy to remember if you already know centimeters to inches, right?
And so I did this a lot, and the first thing I tried to figure out, as many of you might know, when when you're soaking beans, by the way, soaking beans, uh, there's a lot of arguments on whether you should soak beans or you should not soak beans. Um I'm gonna say a lot depends exactly on the kind of bean you're cooking, right? You can cook it without soaking, you can cook it with soaking. Some people say it tastes better if you don't soak it, but what's happening there is people are throwing away the soak water, right? And then because there are a lot of things in the bean that are water soluble, even when the bean is not cooked yet, right?
Uh and the good news about throwing that, the bad news about throwing that stuff away is you throw away some flavor. If you've if you you should just make a habit of tasting bean-soaking water. I've been tasting bean-soaking water for the past month now, and there is flavor. Most of what is leached out is actually sugar. So I think you could probably sugars.
So I think, and colors, right? Because a lot of that stuff's water soluble. So you could probably get a lot of the flavor back that's leached out, honestly, by just adding a little bit of sugar to non-sugared beans. And I think people who are doing things like baked beans, I doubt you would taste that much of a difference between soaked and pitched versus not. I have other solutions for this, but anyway.
The reason to throw away the soaking water, frankly, is uh if beans make you toot. If if if beans are a hardcore musical fruit for you, right, then uh throwing away the bean water uh helps. Don't let anyone tell you different. I've been reading all of the studies. I have some more stuff to get rid of the musicality.
But because I've been testing beans for a lot, if you eat beans at least once a week, that also detuts them. If you make beans once when you're buying canned beans, the way that they typically make those is they are soaked because they want to reduce the amount of energy they're using because they're making tons of beans. So cooking tons of beans for less time is definitely a win for them. They soak it, they pitch it, they blanch it, right? To the reason you gotta blanch the beans, if you think about this, people.
If you're putting a bean in a can, right, you need to get it to basically its finished size before you put it in the can, and you don't want a lot of air coming out of the bean. So what you have to do is you blanch it to try to have it absorb a lot of water, but more importantly, get rid of the air. You then pack it into the can with the amount of water that you're gonna want it to absorb. You cook it, it has to have enough water in the can or sauce in the can to cook it through accurately. Uh and then also, and this is important, as it sits for a couple of weeks, it'll absorb a little more water, right?
As it as it's cooked. So that's why the beans in the can aren't necessarily as as tooty, as you know, as wind-producing as the beans you make from scratch, because they're actually typically dumping a lot of the water that you would otherwise uh keep. Make sense? Yep. All right.
Now, assuming you're not worried about that, uh, here are some interesting facts. I bought a bean pot. I bought an old school like northern bean pot, the ceramic ones, and I have to say I like it a lot. The advan advantage of the bean pot, I'm not one of these people who believe that ceramics are like the be-all and end all of cooking, but they are relatively uh slow. Here's what I do, ready?
I soak the beans. By the way, guess I I did this with five or six different bean varieties, and within a couple of within a couple points, decimal points, what percentage weight do you think beans are when they're cooked versus what multiplier would you use? Like if I have one unit of beans, how many units of cooked beans with with all the liquid drained off do you think you would want to shoot for? Because no one tells you this stuff, right? Yeah.
Okay, so what do you think it is? Three times four? You would think that it's about 2.3. It's about 2.3. But, and for years I tried to cook beans sous-vide, right?
For years. Uh, because I was like, you know, there's the famous Italian beans in the in the fiasco in the bottle, right? And the idea of the beans in the bottle, which are delicious, you remember you ever had those where you shake them out of the bottle? You put the you put the beans, you put the beans, the water, like if you're using alliums and like you know, salt and like rosemary, and you put it all into like a like a wine bottle, you know, like a fiasco, like a Chianti bottle, right? And then that's just got that little neck to to vent out of.
Yeah. And you cook it for a long time, and then when it's done, you shake the beans out. The advantage of these cooking, either a bean pot covered or this, you know, bottle, is that you have to cook it with excess water. That's what my tests have shown. If you don't cook it with excess water, the beans just never taste good.
They never have a lot. So what you want to do is cook the bean in excess water, bring it up to full hydration in excess water, and then slowly evaporate. The reason people's beans break up on them is because they're boiling them rather rapidly on the stove. You can cook a bean for nearly infinity. Anyway, I haven't tested over seven seven, eight hours yet, right?
I will, but uh it but that cooking, that long cooking is a very slow evaporation covered in the oven, right? Or in the Chianti bottle, or on a stove in a pressure cooker that's sealed but not at pressure, right? Or any sort of one of those waterless cookings where your steam evaporation is very low, right? In those kind of long cooking applications with very little actual churning inside, you're not drying out the beans at the top much. It's not very violent, and you're not breaking the beans up.
But you need to have them cook through in excess water. Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay. So you're looking for a final ratio of about 2.3, right?
And you want some extra water. So what you need to do is figure out how much extra water you want in your beans. I'm shooting for a finished salt content uh of about uh 0.875%. Okay. So that's your bacon, your ham if you use it, your salt, whatever salty stuff you're using.
So what I do is I figure out my non-beans and like so in a pound of beans is 464 grams. You with me? Yeah. Okay. And I add somewhere between like like uh like 400 to 700 grams of what I like to call non-bean material, right?
So non-bean material is if you're making baked beans, molasses, right? Or uh mustard powder people do not add acid to beans before they're cooked or they won't cook right, right? Umions, garlic, herbs. And I just calculate those as non-bean and I just pretend like nothing happened. Bacon, ham, whatever.
I pretend that none of those things matter. Does that make sense? Yeah. Okay. So like I'm adding between 400 and 700 grams of non-bean.
You have to calculate the salt content of pork if you're adding it, right? Right. And then I figure that by the end of it, uh I want to have about two kilos of product left over. So for every pound, I want about two, that's that's what I like to call a medium bean liquor situation. They're not dry, but they're not soup, right?
So that's for like a good baked bean situation. So figure that whatever you're cooking should end up being about two kilos if you're following my recipe of about 400 to 700 grams of non-bean product in it, right? Um what that means is is that after they soak, right? Uh uh sorry, I multiply the, I multiply uh the beans by uh 2.3. You multiply by 1.3 to figure out how much extra water to add, right?
Because it itself is one, right? Yeah, right. Okay. Then add about an extra 850 mils of water, right? That's what I soak it in, and then I don't throw it away the water because I have a way to deal with that, which I can talk about later once I've tested it.
And then I cook it on the stove until they're almost done, right? Until they're almost done. Okay. Then I put it into my bean pot my preheated bean pot into your fiasco. Uh you close the lid on the pressure cooker, but don't let it go, and then stop or slow your evaporation for a long time, and then you can let them ride for as long as you want until they're evaporated to the place that you want them.
Does this make sense? Yes. Okay. So that's people have been asking me about the beans. That's the beans.
Well, interesting thing about beans, Dave, is do you know who our guest is next week? Oh, it's next week is the beans guest? All right. All right. So we have uh from we have uh um Steve from Rancho Gordo Beans coming on uh next week.
And he is interesting in that he he basically just he's like just cook the just cook the beans until they're done. He doesn't want to get into any controversy, so we'll see if we can get him to weigh in. Uh you can also ask him questions for next week about nixtimalization. He was the one, although I have never met him, uh, who back when I was doing my nixtimalization um tests in whatever it was way, way back in the day, 12 whatever years ago, 15 yeah, 13 years ago, was like um, yeah, he had a nixtomatic. He was the early US owner of uh Nixdomatic.
So we'll talk to him about nixtimalization, about cooking in ceramics. He has a ceramic saphile, so uh claophile. Wait, wait. Ceramophile? Ceramophile is that a word you made that up.
I did, but it sounds right. Yeah, sounds good. I'll take it. Yeah, I'll take it. Uh yeah, and an all-around uh lover of uh the bean products.
Yeah. Yeah. He has a book. I wonder whether we're gonna put it on sale. At the not a sale, but for the uh kitchen arts and letters.
Good question. I will ask Matt. Yeah. I don't know whether they've re-upped it. That book came out maybe ten 10 years ago, eight years ago.
When did that book come out? I have a copy somewhere, but I haven't read it in a while. I guess I should read it. Uh we're just having him on. Also, uh, who else are we confirm for upcoming guests?
Uh Joy of Cooking folks are gonna be uh June 14th. Hey people, I need you to get your questions ready for those guys. So John Becker and Megan Scott are the current team who's running the uh the joy of cooking, but this has been a family business, sometimes rested away from them by publishers, sometimes and sometimes rested back. It's I mean, I guess it's never fully rested away from it's never fully taken away from uh the family, but it's been a family cookbook since 1931, I want to say, in the early 30s. That's wild.
It's amazing. It's gone through like so many different uh cycles, but uh, you know what it's always remained? Relevant. Yeah, relevant, right? And the the currently retired generation of the of the family, uh Ethan Becker, also like one of the foremost designers of survival knives, which it's it's like that's a crazy thing.
Doesn't make kitchen knives, the guy. Yep. Survival knives. Yeah, we were looking at them this morning. Yeah.
Yeah. Apparently, if you want like an all-around survival knife in the hundred hundred and like $20 range. What was it, the BK2? Is that the one we were looking at? Yeah, it's sold by sold through K-bar.
Yeah, but he's been with K-bar for a long time. So like he, from what I can gather, he like, um, he got into the knife uh stick. He from what I can gather, okay, you familiar with Kukries? No. So Kukries are those knives that are like they're they're they're shaped kind of like uh like a like like a little bit like a hook.
They're like a big bill on the end. So it's like imagine if you took a machete and bent it. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah. That's like a like a kukri.
And I think it's supposed to give you a good angle when you're hacking down through uh brush or people's heads and whatnot, right? Nice. And so he sent some of these to like with his buddies to Vietnam and then like amazingly like was like so how did the knives work? And they were like, well you could change this, you could change this, you could change that. And so he got into like designing and he's an outdoors person.
So he got into designing knives that were useful in a way that like we think that we look at kitchen problems and work on those things. Oh speaking people have been asking uh what do I think of the ANOVA vacuum uh chamber vacate chamber back we're we're getting one we'll review it for you coming up soon um Wiley asked me about this new thing Sue V. Have you heard about this? No. I I don't have one of those so I can't review that sorry if there's anything else let me let me know what else what else we got coming up uh Wiley is coming up as well still working on a date with him um but now that other dates are formed up that we'll get going with that we're gonna have Garrett uh call in in two weeks.
Gary Richard yeah yep to talk about uh well we had this question it's been sitting around forever uh from you know I gotta figure out who it is but who wants to know more things to do with their Hamilton Beach milkshake maker and I was like I've never owned one yeah. Why don't we get Garrett? Yeah. Garrett knows how to use those things. That's true.
And he doesn't make milkshakes with them. That's very true too. Yeah. Yeah. That'll be good.
Yeah. Now I have that s freaking milkshake song going in my head. Uh all right. So let's uh Maxaplun writes in. I'm going to have my kitchen remodel starting in a couple of weeks.
Uh, what are some minimal prep, minimal cleanup things I can cook so I don't have to eat out every single night. Uh I'll have an induction hot plate, instant pot, uh, and hot water kettle. Uh, is this the dump meals time to shine? Well, okay. There's so many things.
Uh what do I, you know, I actually, the beans thing I was just telling you about, like uh like a long baked bean on an induction, if your induction has good low temperature, or you have an instant pot and you can let it ride for a long time so it's just barely evaporating, make yourself a good pot of baked beans, get some nice bread to eat that with, or even I eat the leftovers on rice with like crumpled up, I have to say, French's fried onions. If you don't want to fry good, yeah. If you don't want to fry your own onions, and let's be honest, who the hell wants to fry their own onions? You want to fry your own onions? No.
I'm not saying that you can't fry your own onions. You know what the problem with them is? Not gluten-free, a lot of flour on them. So, like if you if you if that's a problem, you know, but like on baked beans, come on, man. I mean, so baked beans you typically don't, by the way, I don't add sugar and molasses to my baked beans.
I did forgot to mention this. I use about 120 um grams, 120, 125 grams of Crosby's molasses in my baked beans per pound or so, which is light for a baked bean. Most baked bean stuff is like to me, a side dish. I want a baked bean that I can eat as the main dish. And when you add too much molasses and too much sugar to it, it just tastes like dessert or a side dish to me.
It doesn't taste like a main dish. Yeah. See, I want a beans that I can eat it over rice, I can hack them an avocado, put some French fried, French's fried onions on it, maybe even a little sour cream. I turn everything into sour cream, Frenchish fried onions, lettuce. I basically will I will taco bowl anything.
You give me anything that is in goop format, and I will taco bowl it. You know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah. You know why?
Because all of those fixings taste good. Like, like I'll do like uh another good one is uh here's a weird one for you. What one one one dish, right? Hack up a bunch of uh peppers, right? Like so red and red and green, uh, sweat some onions first.
Once the onions are sweated down, throw in some hacked up uh green and green and red peppers, right? Uh then after those sweat down, but not, you know, you just don't want to burn it. Like throw in your garlic, right? By the way, sweat them in butter. By the way, a preposterous amount of butter.
While that stuff is like so stupid, the amount of butter you're gonna use, right? Then uh uh get the cheap, see, I'm a big fan of cheap salt fish, cheap salt fish. Like for holidays, you want the really good, the the good bacalh, the good salt fish, right? Because you're gonna reconstitute it. You're gonna you're gonna let it soak for days, you're gonna keep changing the water, and you want these big pieces, and you're gonna serve it with the parsley and the oil and the and the and the lemon and the sliced onions, all that stuff, right?
You're gonna do that, do it up. But for this, get the cheap one, the one that comes in a little bag, you know what I mean? They're thin. Throw those things, rinse the extra salt off, throw them into a big pot of water, bring the water up to a simmer, uh, but don't boil it, and then dump the water, do it again. Now it's ready to use, right?
Hack that up small, right? While the sweating the peppers and you got the and you got this fish stuff, and you remember butter. Don't but don't stint on the butter, right? Then boil and mash yams. Real yams, not sweet potatoes, yams, the white ones, yams, the tuber.
You could do potatoes if you want, but the problem with potatoes is is they have a different texture. It'll still be delicious, but you gotta be careful when you're mixing it that it doesn't get gluey, right? So, like you mash up the yams, then you throw that all together with the butter and the yams, and you you you stir that up, and that's your base glop. That's your base glop. Then with the base glop, rice, taco bullet, rice, you need avocados with that son of a gun, hacked up tomatoes, lettuce, lime.
You need to squeeze lime on it. Lime, avocados, and I like sour cream, and I put I put you know hot pepper all over mine because come on, it's me. You know what I mean? Yeah. Anyway, that's a good one-pot uh thing that I make quite often.
Um if Nastasi was still on the phone, she would say pastas. Yeah, always pastas. Always pastas, always pastas, right? Yeah, pasta delicious. Pasta delicious.
Also, like you didn't mention blender, but I'm a huge fan of no-cook uh blender-based sauces. And just using the residual heat from the pasta to heat up like a thicker blender-based sauce, right? So, you know, there are many different blender-based sauces, right? So pesto is a blender-based sauce. By the way, do you when you make a pesto, do you do you do you make do you actually use pignolis and all that?
Not re I mean, no, not really. What do you use? You throw almonds in that sucker? Sometimes, I don't know, it depends what nuts I have around. Yeah.
But yeah, I don't know. I guess I I'll yeah. I'm probably do that more by price when I'm at the market. Yeah. See what nut looks interesting and different.
Yeah, pignoles are always just too expensive. They are, right? Yeah. They're so dang expensive. Yeah.
You know what uh I've been told by Harold McGee not to use is walnuts. Why? Uh they oxidi well again, I don't know. But basically, uh the tests he ran way back in the day, I believe his findings were that they uh are the ones that caused the basil to oxidize the fastest. Interesting.
Yeah. Okay. So anyway, pet pestos are good. Uh a can of tomato place paste plus anchovies plus anything else is always good. Easy.
You know what I mean? Yeah. Um what else is a good like one pot uh wonder, not a lot of mess. What else? What else you got, John?
What's a what's a good uh anything? Breakfast for dinner, eggs, bacon, things like that, pancakes. I like that. Yeah, the the the trick with pancakes is just being able to mix them in one bowl, not have like make a mess with the bowl. And you can do it.
Yeah. But I do it. You know, like uh like I can I can have pancakes on the table basically instantly. You know what I mean? And without making uh, you know, dirting a dirtying a lot of uh a lot of stuff.
Yeah I love the giant pancake though. You know I make the giant pancake. I didn't know that. I have the cramping. Oh, right, right, right, yes, yes, and I've I make one pancake because I'm not about sitting there flipping over all these silver dollars, sons of guns.
It's just not my life. That's not how my life works. All right. So uh I wouldn't dump meal it. Uh oh, by the way, if you have uh now is the time to do oh shoot, it's too hot.
I don't know where you live, Max Oplun, but if I had gotten to you even a couple of weeks ago, you know what's a delicious one-pot sucker? You need uh to make rice separately. Well, it's two pots. You need a pan for risotto and you need the pot asubuco. Yeah.
Asibuko is so delicious. It is. You know what else is delicious? Um and it doesn't mess your kitchen up too much, except for the initial frying, right? So you can you can um if you want, you can brown the the the meat.
You can use turkey uh cut up turkey legs. Get your butcher to cut up turkey legs if you can't afford the uh the asebuco, because asubuco is absurdly expensive. Yeah it does. Make sure you tie it when you flour it. You can um you can do that in your pan on the induction so that you're not trying to I hate browning in my in my pots that I braise in, right?
I hate it. Yeah. I don't like making asebuco in wide things because I don't want it to evaporate too much. So a lot of times I'll I'll do my initial fry in the pan that I'm gonna do the risotto in. Then I'll move them over to my pot uh and I'll deglaze and then dump that into the pot, let that go, because that's gotta cook for a couple of hours anyway.
Then I can scrub out the pan I did my initial fry in and then do the risotto when it makes sense. Yep. Anyway. Uh God, I made some turkey asabuko. If it wasn't for those damn tendons, I hate those tendons.
Yeah. Hate the tendons. Turkey's good though. Turkey delicious, yeah. You know what I've never done?
I've never done uh I've never done uh chicken thigh uh in this style of asubuko. And it doesn't look like asebuco, but you could tie them into birds. What what what do they call those little things in French, those tied up volatile they call them vole, right? They're little like but they're usually birds of veal. It's usually you take like a veal cutlet, you roll it up into like like almost like a drumstick shape, and then you like braise it off and they call them vole, don't they?
I don't know. I'm not sure. I don't know. Yeah, I don't know. It's been a million years, but like I'm sure that would be good.
Yeah. I also I make but this makes a lot of smoke, so you probably don't want to do this, but like uh uh I do salting book, another veal dish that I do with chicken, but I always do it with breast because uh, you know, I do the uh breast pounded out. And then I was like, why don't I do this with chicken thighs? And the verdict was, and you know, you put the prosciutto on or spec and with a sage. I put the sage underneath to do it, and if you're really doing it, you can meat glue the prosciutto with the sage to the meat so that you don't have to use toothpicks to keep the meat on, right?
Uh and then I was like, why don't I make this with uh with with thigh meat instead of with breasts? And I was like, oh, oh, it's because I'm stupid. That's why. Um so do you think do you think I'm supposed to pronounce this Jameson or am I supposed to pronounce it jam five on? I think it's Jameson.
I think Jameson, yeah. But jam five on is also good. Yeah. Because now I've got like a loony song in my head. Five on it.
Not familiar? You're not familiar with I Got Five On It? I don't think so. Have you been to California before? What?
Two or three times, yeah. Two or three times? Maybe four. You've been to San Francisco? Twice.
Twice. And you've never heard the song I've got five on it. I don't think so. Okay. Yeah.
Right, Jack? Sorry to disappoint everybody. Yeah. I mean, does that make does that make any sense at all? Oh, maybe if I heard it, but we can do that.
I've got five on it. What's the here? I got five on it. You never heard this song? No, I don't think so.
Oh my God. Yep, living under a rock, I guess. Listen, if you own a bar, here's a good skill. I don't own a bar, so I don't need this skill. I would like to own a bar maybe someday again.
Uh if you own a bar what and you're and you and you're controlling the music and you're also talking to the guests when they come in. So what you need to do is get like a couple of songs from every city and state around the country so that when someone comes in from there, you can bust out like whatever like the local thing is. So when I know someone is like from like San Francisco or like, you know, someone comes in from like San Francisco or Oakland or Sacramento, like you can play music from there, and it always gets them in the mood. And then when they're in the mood, then it makes the person next to them, who's probably from like Long Island or Jersey, right? Like, like they get in a better mood because all of a sudden you made this California person, you're like, ah, I used to listen to that when I was a kid.
You know, you bust out like the E40 or like uh Mac Dre. You gotta listen to some California stuff, John. You can't just listen to your East Coast, can't keep your head up your behind and only listen to East Coast stuff. Jack, am I right about this or no? Yeah, absolutely.
Absolutely. We need a West Coast hip hop education. But not just that, like is Southern, like, you know, you gotta have some stuff like from like Texas, you gotta have some stuff from like Freegan, like Atlanta, Florida. You know what I mean? Sure.
Yeah. Yeah. Some Detroit stuff. Yep. No matter where someone comes from, if you can play music that was like from where they were when they were like a kid, that they enjoy it.
I'm just saying that they enjoy it. You don't have to do it. Uh from Jam, I got five on it. What'd you say, Jack? It's nice.
It's a nice thing to do. Yeah. But it's not just nice, it's good for business. It's good for business. Yeah.
Uh Dave Chang uh on May 5th in his podcast, uh, around the minute, 15, 30 seconds, says that we, meaning anyone, I guess, can't make good pizza at home and can't make it as good as pros good, so we should quit. Also, Chris Ying repeatedly derides gadget cooking uh in semi-scare quotes. Can you have single quotes of scare quotes, or do you need to have double quotes if they're supposed to be scary? I think single works. Single is scary?
Yeah, I think so. I don't know. I'm not afraid of a single quote. Gotta give me two quotes to get me afraid. Um tough guy.
Do I have a response? Uh well, look, I I think, first of all, in their podcast, like they have to be somewhat in incendiary. Like, that's kind of like that's their MO, right? To be a little bit incendiary. Nastasia 100% agrees with them.
Nastasi's like, why do anything when professionals are doing it? I and you know, what I think is there's a there's a there's a couple of things. Is it true that the odds that you will make a pizza? There's a very good odds that you can make pizza better than someone who does it their whole life who doesn't care. Very good odds.
Because if they don't care, they're just never gonna get good at it, right? Like uh, you know, like in in lunch cafeteria pizza is never gonna get good. Someone can make it their whole life and it's never gonna get good because they don't care. I'm not saying that's a bad thing to say, but you know what I mean? Like dollar slice pizza is never gonna get above dollar slice pizza because the goal, their goal in life, isn't to make the world's greatest pizza, it's to make dollar slices, and they're very good at it.
And I have a fond spot in my heart for the Sixth Avenue, West Fourth Street, dollar slice, right? Uh, and just the fact that they can crank it so hard. That's like the two for a dollar hot dog joints that they I mean, they're not two for a dollar anymore, but man, I used to walk in and just dog after dog after dog. I mean, there's just certain kind of like zen craziness about just the number of hot dogs that came out of those places, just like infinity of hot dogs. I used to have these dreams where I would walk in, you know, I'm in grad school, and so like my standard lunch was five dogs, 250, right?
So I'm like, you know, cheapest. I'm like five dogs, two fifty. They're like, fine. And that's you know, if I had the 50 cents, otherwise it's four dogs for two bucks, right? But I used to have this dream that I would throw a party and I've never done it.
Where I would walk in with like a crisp, crisp hundo and just be like, uh, Benjamin, and hand it to them and be like, give me 200 dogs right now. But you know what? They could have cranked it. They could have just they wouldn't have even blinked. Well, they wouldn't have blinked.
They just would have cranked out a hundred dogs. Yeah. 200. 200, 200. 200.
200. Hand them 100, they hand you 200 dogs. Amazing. Yeah. It's amazing.
Yeah. Yeah. Anyway. Um, probably terrible for the environment. But you know what I mean?
Like, like someone has to lose. If I can walk in and have such a huge win where I hand someone a hundred dollars and they very quickly create wrap, bag and hand me 200 hot dogs for that, something's wrong with the world. Somebody's getting hosed badly. Someone is losing a big time. You know what I mean?
And maybe it's all of us in the long run, but anyway, it has to be has to be figured out. Has to be figured out. Um, but what I think is this: there, they're you're not gonna get better than someone who cares as much as you do, but does it constantly, right? Because they have the opportunity to get better than you can because they're doing it all the time and they care as much as you do, right? That I'm stipulating that they care as much as you do.
They also have the money to get the good equipment. Uh I think it's fundamentally incorrect. They bring up croissant as a thing specifically in that episode that you shouldn't try to do. And I made uh croissant once or twice, and you know what? They were fine.
They're fine. Were they the best croissant? Not by a mile. But I'm happy I did it because I have an appreciation for making croissant now. It's not about whether or not I can do it as good as the world's greatest croissant maker.
It's about as a crafts person in general, I want to understand what it's like to make something. And so I do it. But do I do it all the time? No. Right?
Yeah. Um things like pizza, like I I also think that, you know, um, and they talked about it a little bit on the on the episode. Uh a lot of people who make pizza, they they they build their recipes at home around the limitations of an oven, right? So you load up with uh with uh uh steel and whatnot, and you're you're overcoming the fact that your oven doesn't have as much power as a commercial oven does and it can't get as hot. And you could probably crank one good pizza out of a home oven that way.
The problem is you can't repeatably do it like you can uh in a restaurant, and you have to change the dough. So what a lot of like people who write for home people do, uh, which like I'm doing some now with my current book, is you modify the recipes to try to get a result that's good with the equipment you know the people have. And so there's honor in that, right? Um, and you enjoy doing it, so just do it. You know what I mean?
Yeah. And as for gadgets, I love a gadget. Although I'm de-gadgetizing some stuff and going more I'm going anti-Alton Brown actually. I'm going into single use things. Like on my uh my mixer now just does mixing, right?
Like I had the food processor attachment for that, and you're like, you know what? I bought a hand crank food processor. Like I'm buying a hand uh because I'm an idiot. I'm buying a hand uh meat grinder. Because I'm not gonna grind a thousand pounds of meat, but there's this recipe I want to make.
You ready for it? I sent you the image. Oh, I never responded. Yeah, sorry, I was dealing with the big stuff. But yeah, no, that is ridiculous.
Devil dogs. Are you ready for this recipe, people? I'll give uh I'm gonna make it hopefully this weekend after my meat grinder comes. You take American cheese, I'm assuming government style, block, right? Half pound.
Half pound, but I'm assuming not slices, block. Yeah, yeah. For yeah. Half pound of hot dogs, Frankfur's, right? Now you ready for it?
You grind them together. Grind them together, mix it with mayonnaise, mustard, and if you would like some sweet relish. And is there any onion or whatnot in that? No, prepared mustard, egg, salt, make it, egg, egg. That was the thing I forgot.
So you bind it together with egg, right? Pickle relish. Yeah, pickle relish, mayonnaise. So mayonnaise is the fat other than the hot dog and the cheese. And then you you spread that into hot dog buns.
Joe, you ready for this? You wrap them in aluminum foil and you bake those suckers. So they're like baked. And then they come out in the aluminum foil. I have to say I'm gonna crush these things.
That sounds great. I'm just gonna crush these suckers. You know what I mean? They're gonna come out of the oven all soft and melty, and I'm just gonna rip through that. I bought a number 10 hand meat grinder, specifically, Joe, to do this recipe.
Where did you find this recipe? So uh my cousin Brady's grandma would put all of her recipes in old school file cards. And so it's like it's like 40 or 50 or years of file cards. And I was just going through them and I was like, devil dogs. That's not the kind of devil dog I'm used to, but I'm for it.
Yeah, I'm definitely for it. I'm gonna cook the hell out of those things. Yeah. You know, I love it. Yeah, but it'll be delicious.
It calls for a grinder. Yeah. I mean, how do you think she did it? Did she have a meat grinder? I gotta ask Brady.
Anyway. Uh I'll let you guys know. Uh Colton Johnson wrote in, hey everyone, I recently bought a ninja creamy. Is it really called a creamy? Their fake Paco Jets called a creamy.
That's gross. Creamy. It is, yeah. Ninja creamy. Yeah.
I don't like that. Do you like that name? No, not really. How about just like the ninja ice cream maker? Yeah.
I don't know. Joe, where are you where are you with creamy? I'm indifferent about it. Creamy's creamy. Well, it's creamy with an eye.
I just don't like the name Ninja. So I mean, this like you can put like anything in front of creamy. It'd be all right. I also dislike the name Ninja. Have you seen the movie Dead Sushi?
No. No. Yeah. It's by the same director who did Machine Girl. Have you seen Machine Girl?
Do you like bad, like splatterfest, like Japanese weird movies? I don't mind it. Like like Tatsumo's Iron Man and stuff like that. Yeah, but but more recent. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Gotcha. Um, okay. Uh recently bought the uh creamy, and I absolutely love it. I have not used it. I've only used uh the Italian fake Paco Jet and Paco Jets.
I still have not because the thing is that it's hard for me to like I literally like any time a new piece of kitchen equipment shows up in my house, and by the way, I'm having another piece. Someone asked me on the Twitter about this microwave pressure cooker. Coon Recon makes a microwave pressure cooker. It only gets up to I think eight and a half PSI because of the temperature limits of the resin, because it's resin-based, not metal, right? And you throw it in the microwave, and it got some bad reviews because people don't understand how microwaves and and pressure cookers work.
So they're like, my microwave has more than 900 watts. Like Coon Recon was basically just saying that you can't put dump more than 900 watts into it because you're gonna evaporate too much water. Right. Right? And you'll you'll ruin it.
So you have to, once it comes up to pressure, you have to turn it down, right? But it got so I they must be discontinuing it because you can go on Coon Recon's site right now and buy them for $30 a piece. Anyway. Damn. Uh I've mainly been playing around with sorbetes and dairy-free ice cream options, but wanted to try more traditional ice cream base with egg in it.
What is Dave's basic ice cream uh recipe base? Okay, mine is not very good. It's extremely rich, John, but I make it and I still like it. 10 egg yolks, right? 500 milk, 500 heavy cream, 170 grams of sugar, and then if you're gonna put vanilla in it, two scraped vanilla beans, then I uh I put uh salt in it to taste.
I usually just I don't measure it, right? Then uh I cook that vacuum bag it, I put drop it into an 85 degree Celsius bath so the temperature immediately drops down to 82. Cook it at 82 Celsius for about 20 minutes, pull it out. Make sure you rap a tap tap that bag uh after it pulls out because you gotta break up any weird curdy stuff that happens that really increases the uh the the niceness of that texture. And that is a good but very rich base, and you can add other stuff too.
It's probably too rich for the on glazed bases you're used to, right, John? Yes, you can also find Dave's uh onion ice cream recipe in one of the old Patreon posts. Right. For dollar uh with your shrimp problem to keep it warm. Um I just go low.
If you have a steam oven, go real low. You're drying it out like, but if you keep it down at like, you know, uh 40, 45, there your shrimp should be fine, it won't get too much harder as it goes. But if you keep it in the oven in a pan, it's gonna dry out and and get overcooked. I can deal more with that uh on the next go-around. And someone asked me, Douglas asked me about um this like standalone hood, the air hood.
I have not used it, but I am dubious that you actually get the number of hours out of cooking out of it that that they say you do. But hey, uh I'm looking for it. Uh and then is that all we got for this week? We have more coming up. That's all for this week.
All right, we're gonna be back next week with more cooking issues.
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